How often do we look at our own lives and see the failures, the heartaches, the problems, the frustrations, and then look at someone else’s curated social media feed and see their wins, joy, accomplishments, and perfect unicorn cupcakes drizzled in gold? It’s apples to oranges folks, yet we make these ridiculous comparisons all the live long day.
How many days do you start with a to-do list, ready to rule the world, only to review it before your head hits the pillow at night and realize you accomplished virtually nothing on it? More to do tomorrow, more to fail tomorrow.
We drag ourselves through the mud, as though life isn’t doing a good enough job of it for us. We focus on the misses so much we cannot see the hits. We compare apples to oranges all day long folks, making ridiculous comparisons that only bring us down.
In reality, caring for another individual is full of successes, we just need to learn to think differently. I’m not suggesting we celebrate mediocracy and everyone gets a medal for showing up. I am suggesting we celebrate small victories and acknowledge our over loaded plates and complications caregiving presents in day to day situations. If you think of all the people that could be in your shoes, other family members or friends, that have opted out of the primary caregiving role, you really do deserve a medal JUST FOR SHOWING UP. When your realize just how needed you are, you realize how all the little things you do that feel unnoticed, really are needed.
More than that, you nourished a persons body, you helped them do what they can no longer do themselves, just to get through the day. You likely cleaned up some messes along the way, made more than one phone call on their behalf, battled over some relatively minor need, and maybe even got to watch Wheel of Fortune. You brought comfort and hopefully a smile or two to another human being. That’s something.
Throughout the day, and especially at the end of it, intentionally acknowledge when something goes well. When you’ve made that person’s life go on a little smoother than it would have with out you. When you do accomplishment something on your to-do list. When you have five minutes to breath or bring calm to yourself, when you get to enjoy that chocolate chip cookie. Take it in and do it on purpose. The positive is there with the negative, we just have to choose to see it.
Look for the wins of the day, no matter how trivial. At the end of the day, give yourself a high five and call it a success. Because it is.